By Dr. Kerry Knight
The Blessing of Peace
“The Lord will give strength unto his people; the Lord will bless his people with peace.” (Psalm 29:11)
I think all would agree that living in peace is much preferred over the alternative. Today’s world is in chaos and ready to boil over. Why do people choose conflict rather than control? Why are nations willing to destroy the world to gain a few extra acres of land? The answer is “greed.” And greed has its own category of sin. Peace is a gift from God, and not only in worldly affairs, but within the human heart. When you visit the town of Bethlehem in modern-day Israel, people are cautious. During the Christmas holiday, you will see armed soldiers watching over the crowd for violence. How ironic can that be?
When Jesus came into this world as the Babe of Bethlehem, He was called the Prince of Peace. What a beautiful title. Only God could create that one.
I want to look at this on a personal level. Do you have peace in your life? We dream of a world where there is no war, no fighting, no disputes on the large canvas. But what about in your home? So many marriages are beset with arguments and volleying words that hurt. Love that was center stage in the beginning of wedlock is now lost to blame and criticism. Children are caught up in the screaming of mom and dad. They rush to their room and lock the door. They play music or a game on their media device to escape the unpleasantness. I have done an enormous amount of counseling through the years, and one session I will never forget. A husband and wife had moved into a habit of mutual criticism. They would raise their voices while trying to make a point as to why they chose to fight all the time. Soon, they got tired of fighting and went into a pattern of saying nothing at all. They became mute, not speaking unless the phone rang, and then they would go into another room. They had become unadoring roommates, nothing more. The feeling of isolation began to affect the wife. There were no words for each other. No greetings. No interest. She began to feel the tragedy of what their marriage had become. She missed his voice, but nothing. One day she went to the doorway of his bedroom and just knelt outside to hear his voice. But soon she realized he was talking to another woman. It was her greatest nightmare. He seemed to talk into the phone with laughter and enthusiasm for hours, but it was only a few minutes. When he finally came out of the bedroom, he grabbed his coat and said, ”I’ll be back later.” He didn’t return that night, then came in early the next morning to catch a shower and change clothes. She quietly asked him if they could talk later. “About what”?, he said sternly. She smiled through tears and said, “Well we are talking. Didn’t you notice?” He actually smiled back. “Yeah, maybe talking would be good.” He was now looking at her differently, like the old days. That evening they sat on the couch together and set some ground rules. The first one was no shouting. Then they began to talk about the old days. Yes, the children were grown and gone. Just the two of them. “Do we really have something left” became the topic. They didn’t bring up anything negative or critical about the other. They began to realize how important recreating peace in the home could be. Genuine flattery led to seeing the other in a whole new light. They saw what they had been missing. She knew he was seeing someone else, but it was not going to ruin 20 years of marriage. He admitted his indiscretion, and he said there was nothing there. He would end it, so that they could rediscover one another. They talked for two solid hours, then she jumped up and said I’ve got to fix you dinner. “Oh no, “ he said. “I’m taking you to our favorite restaurant. We’ve got something to celebrate.”
There is another scripture that offers an olive branch and that’s Ephesians 4:31 and 32: “Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” Many are not aware of how valuable a little kindness can be in a relationship. Kindness has been called “love’s conduct.” Husbands and wives should make a point to read I Corinthians 13 everytime they are tempted to get one-upmanship on the other. The fourth verse of that chapter says, “love is kind.” If you really love your partner, shouldn’t you practice kindness? Shouting gives way to quiet, and quiet leads to peace.
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